“Yeah, Rudy made so many unanswered calls, the iPhone started labeling him as spam.” — TREVOR NOAH
“Can we acknowledge what a fall this has been, huh? This man went from being an American hero to now sounding like a telemarketer selling a coup: [imitating Giuliani] ‘If you order now, I’ll throw in that chair Abraham Lincoln is sitting on.’” — TREVOR NOAH
“And you know, this is another example of how historic President Trump really was. Any other time in U.S. history, if the president’s lawyer called someone, they would take that call. But when Trump’s vampire lawyer called people, everyone was, like, ‘Tell him I’m not here! Yeah, tell him I went camping and died!’” — TREVOR NOAH
“Also, not that I’m encouraging it, because I’m not, but if you are going to try to overturn an election, maybe don’t leave voice mails? It’s a paper trail. Also it’s 2022 — text! Who leaves voice mails? You realize how thirsty you’re coming off? ‘Hey, it’s me again.’ Come on, Rudy, just hit ’em with a quick late-night ‘U Up? For subverting democracy? Eggplant emoji, red hat emoji, vampire emoji.’ Come on, Rudy, keep up with the times!” — TREVOR NOAH
